follow-through phobia bus conductors and naughty auto generated passwords

okay so there was a strange incident yesterday. I was on the bus on the way to supper with miss W we paid for our tickets to Highbury barn where we were meeting some of her work friends for supper... the nice conductor promised to let us know when the stop was... as he collected our fares with one of those new ticket machine thingies... he let the ticket print out and then tore it 3/4 of the way across and then handed over the little machine to us individually motioning for us to each tear off the final 1/3 of the ticket... how very odd... is this indicative of some sort of follow through phobia? Or do I simply notice very odd behaviours in people?

probably the latter

on another more humorous note... once of our microsite partners today produced a hilarious error... in signing up for the service their systems generate a random password taken from the English dictionary... the password can only be 8 words long and thus truncates the random word at the 8th letter... Apparently the test team requested a change to their password issuing system when they were assigned the password 'punish me' while testing! LOL! how hilarious is that! it truncated 'punishment'!

how much Dutch chocolate can one PC production team consume during a 9h period? approximately 600g /21.1 oz to be exact... won't be needing supper after all!

happy turkey day

to my family back home and to my friends too of course!

received this really cool shirt from my mum in the post today. It says trick on the front and treat on the back in orange writing... it's black and as you can guess it's a hallowe'en shirt :0) too cute!

the weekend was nice and relaxing, didn't end up in Antwerp as intended but chilled a lot and had great dinner with friends and a nice long bike ride. Monday morning, however... came too quickly.

less than a month till my trip to NYC getting well excited about it!

did you know that...

it's possible to do Signing With Your Baby: and that you can use sign language to communicate before your baby can talk.???

Well the other night when I was out with the lovely miss Hannah she was telling me about her boyfriend's brother's child who is learning sign language concurrently to speach. Apparently it's well popular in dem united states... it helps reduce frustration and subsequently crying in babies. How cool is that... man... not that I've got a degree in lanaguage aquisition or anything like that... (okay I do but I never talk about it) but it's such a brilliant idea!

My sign language interpreter friend would be most interested in this indeed....

excuse me while i run off and have babies so i can play!

dang... guess I'd need a bloke for that...

foiled again!

last night

when I returned home from my evening visiting with the lovely Hannah... I plugged in my mobile that had been dead all day. I cleared out the messages that I had received throughout the day. I noticed that I had one stored in my outgoing folder... I opened it and it read

'call dad'

now I'm absolutely clueless as to how that go there as I certainly didn't write it, nor did anyone touch my phone yesterday as it was out of juice...

I kind of wish I could call him as I would love to have a chat... but as my sister put it... but there is no way to call him up there!

message from beyond?

hmm I kind of would like to think so...

I'm thinking that he's been around London lately... Tuesday after work as I rushed out the back door of the office out of the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of a man sitting on a chair... identical profile to my father... I didn't dare look back for a closer look as I didn't want to disappoint myself because I knew that it was in theory impossible to see him... maybe he's stopped by for a visit?

Hi dad! love you!

you know

it's pretty amazing...

for the first time since like forever I'm not skint. It doesn't take a genius to figure out why, but god damned, it's a nice change.

this month is just flying by and soon in just a couple more weeks it will be time to flutter off to NYC! so so so excited about that.

popped into Harvey nics at lunch and had some fab french guy make my face glow... tee hee... makeup counters generally scare the poop out of me but this guy was sound and it wasn't so scary (but i really just went in to buy my flatmate a b'day pressie)... I'm meeting hannah after work tonight... she'll wonder what the occasion is ... i so rarely wear makeup to work (anything more than lipgloss that is...

dang where did the day go?

flowers flights and physio

I received the most beautiful bouquet of flowers from miss w. I didn't think it was possible for me to blush so much... t'was the last thing I expected to be quite honest... I couldn't believe the admin who rang me to tell me I had received them. I was convinced that they were for someone else. Needless to say I was beaming for the rest of the day.

The goodness continued as I found a flight home for xmas for 477£ super deal considering that the other direct fares were much closer to 700£. I'm flying with Kaffin's airline and will be there for 10 days! I can't wait!


Had a great but hilarious evening last night as I managed to jerk my neck and cause some serious pinched nerve pain... I couldn't move an inch! Laughing and crying in pain I managed to make it to work this morning... re-affirming that tube and bus travel while experiencing neck pain is so so so not recommended! Back to physio for me tonight again... shut up tasha I can hear you giggling!

no i'm serious I can hear you!

sail away with me

what will be will be...

I know that i was yonkers ago but i keep thinking how much the girls from the Filament office would have just loved David Grey'sTrafalgar square concert...

i'm thinking i should name my wee cycle as I've been spending so much time with her commuting to and from work... any suggestions? she sort of champagne coloured...

do you ever wonder sometimes what it would be like to just pack it all in... leave your job and just head out into the unknown? I know that eveverything would be ordinary eventually.... but it's nice to dream. back to my long term financial planning... *playingcoughsthelotto* if only I could actually earn money off of playing celebdac

past life

while downloading some completely useless emoticons for msn messenger here... I got to thinking about sally... she often says that she is convinced that she was a tropical fish in her past life. I once asked her to describe the type of fish she was and she sounded like a fancy black fish with flowing fins...

I wonder if I was anything in my past life? I hear people say that piceseans are at the last round of your life cycle and that when I die I shall finally get some rest... no more coming back, but if you ask me I feel as if I was kind of a young spirit... don't know if I've been around before or not?

Have you?

Speaking of past lives... I was stood on the corner waiting to cross the road to get to my office, a motorcycle pulled up I looked at the driver in the eyes and swear to god it was my ex... Okay so yea maybe I made myself believe it because of the bike and all but the eyes, the nose the figure... I swear it was him... and there is a good chance that it was as the last time I spoke with him, he told me that him and his wife and his daughter were probably moving here in a couple of years... I wonder if that's true? I would so love to catch up with him, meet the baby and such ... ring me Shawn melito :)

because robert smith says so and that's why!


do the unstuck

it's a perfect day for letting go
setting fire tobridges, boats and other dreary worlds you know
lets get happy

it's a perfect day for making out
to wake up with a smile without a doubt
to burst scream giggle jump sing and shout
lets get happy

but it's much too late
you said, for doing this now now
should of done it then but it just goes to show
how long it's been and how you really should know
that it's never too late to get up and....... GO

tra la la

tra la la

it's the perfect day to
throw back your hair
and kiss it all goodbye

okay yea so while I'm writing this my co-worker walked by and placed a print out on my dest that reads:

----------------------------------
IF DECK
IS SALTY
THERE WILL
BE LASHINGS
-----------------------------------

Okay now it makes a bit more sense...

unsatiable hunger....

and extreme wanting to be back where i left you this morning. If i close my eyes I can almost feel your breath on my cheek.

blogging

these days has been a bit of a challenge to say the least. It's mostly having to do with working so gosh darned much... no excuses... what on earth will my one faithful reader do for enjoyment? *scoff*

since i've last written I've made an exorbitantly expensive train journey to Bristol where I worked my ass off for a day trying to get this damned project off the ground... fruitful as it was there is still a ways to go.

cycling to work continues like a storm... cooler mornings now are a bit more challenging to motivate and dark nights post gym are a little daunting but with blinkity blinkity lights it's better.

kaffin is now booke in to join me in NYC how spendid... i know another secret but i just can't tell *bursts*

oi how is it that flights to belgium and even train journeys costs almost as much as my flight to NYC? I will never understand!!!!!!!

during my recent bout of very uncharacteristic insomnia I've mostly been enjoying the amazing view of the sky from my bedroom window... nothing but sky for miles and miles and not buildings blocking the view... space in london- quite a luxury indeed :)

what to do...

in the morning to make you smile:

-sing been caught stealing by Jane's Addiction (changing 'stealing ' to 'speeding' ) to to flatmate who's just been done for speeding :)

- cycle to work through hyde park and breathe in the beauty

what not to do...

- attempt to disembark the number 98 bus on Oxford st. while it's still moving... the poor bloke spilt all over the pavement... he's lucky it was just a ripped suit!

- realise that the location that your beautiful cycle brought you is indeed work... and that yes, you're now a prisoner of your desk for the next nine hours!

naeot!
Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae we do not raed ervey lteter by it slef but the wrod as a wlohe.

pttrey azamnig

desk

is now clean... all stray papers have been filed... a bit of neurosis to try and help get this mountain of work looking like something is attainable... We all had a good laugh the other day as our arsey Sr. Boss guy so gently put it to us... 'there are 7 days in a week and 24h in a day, so there is simply no excuse for things to not be completed' this is not the type of place where overtime is a common occurance for all staff and the reluctance for this to become that type of place was quite comical to say the least... oh boy.... when exactly is it that I will become financially intependant and not need to work anymore? No time soon I bet cha!

Tickets to NYC are booked for November, can't wait... seems like an eternity until then... There is always a weekend with sio in Antwerp to look forward to, but jaysus why is the eurostar just so dang expensive? I guess it still is faster than flying if you take into account that you've got your travel time to the airport then your check in 1h ahead thing...so I guess it's worth it...

The flatmates should all be back in the fort by the begining of next week... where did the month go? off and away like vapors...

this weekend I was mostly

having fun at this
free concert it was brilliant... even Carlione a die hard David Grey - hater was impressed with him... Sky and Morcheba were fantastic too. Thanks to Andy whom I work with for scoring me a ticket!

It was a nice quiet weekend before the gig on Sunday... Saw the lovely miss Dearbhla and Jane and Caroline and Dani and all that crew when I ventured down south to Clapham for a social gathering on Saturday. Jane jets off on her year long travel adventure with her gf starting in Peru! How exciting for them!

To Austria with me next week. The lovely Chris (our admin) has booked me into a fab hotel in the centre and I get to fly out the night before so I have a bit of time to explore Vienna, sweet!

Kaffin is still due to arrive on Friday morning. I think I might try and squeeze in a visit to the ol salon in the morning to get my hair coloured it's been ages... will be so nice to see her and have a whole day off!

My LAN line is to be installed tomorrow for an exorbitant cost of course since we're the first occupants of this flat... will be nice to hear my mum's voice again as it's been well over a month since we've last spoken... didn't quite appreciate the value of having a home phone before this...

Miss B has returned from her travels with Sally. Can't wait to hear about the wilds of Vietnam!

Tumbling class tonight for me but nothing involving my neck says my physio... can't wait!

Fitness kick is back on again... watch this space... I've taken to cycling to work (although this involves me getting lost as I am crapola at navigating west London). I've also joined the new gym near my work... it's got a pool, how fit!?!?!

Sean has apparently fallen off the face of the earth.

on my desktop right now...

is a picture of the ocean... taken from within the swell of a wave. nothing tacky nothing over stated nothing contrived... there is no break to the wave, it's just starting to swell... the angle is such, that you can feel the anticipation of how large it's going to be... the blue of the ocean melds with the sky, the scene is impending. when I look at it I can conjure the feeling of being right there, heart racing, feeling the swell grow, awaiting the moment when you get pulled with the surf.

pictures are just so amazing...

okay so i'm really really really naughty and ripped the picture from 28mm.org... but it's brill so shhh don't tell the photographer...

so

i'm not quite as low as I was last week... I think not having a home phone and not being able to speak to my mum in any means other than email in over a month just made things worse... I think my hormones are evil and punishing me for not breeding... PMS was an evil force in my broodiness lately...

I've just finished this article for mutationspottig and it's funny, how something like that give you such a great sense of achievement. A feeling that you don't often get once you've left education. Don't get me wrong, there is no chance of me going back for another degree or anything of the sorts, any time soon... but it's good to track these sorts of feelings... helps you keep track of time, attribute order to things in life.

My trip to NL was cancelled this week so I won't see my seestor tonight like I had planned... however, she will be in town next weekend, so I'm taking Friday off to spend with her. In theory I was going to go home for a visit as I could have had the week of the 8th off but why bother as the flights are insanely dear right now.. and Kaffin would be here...

However, in an effort to keep my will to live going... I've booked the rest of the holidays for this year. I'm going to NYC in November (providing miss Y will have me) then heading home for xmas on the 17th... I can always shave off some days from my xmas visit if I start going mad mid Oct. (very probable) but hey... that's not far off normal is it?

The lovely miss Siobhan rang me last night! It was so great to speak to her and hear about her new adventures in Belgium. I'll probably nip over there to visit her in the next two weeks to see how he and Annouk are settling. I'm so happy to be back in touch with her again!

last year

radiohead showed me how to disapear completely... thank goodness i've not forgotten how as i would sort of like to do that again.

if you're looking for me, look behind a cloud just north of the river

but really:

i'm not here
this isn't happening

celeb bingo

continues... Borris Becker was having lunch at the oyster bar this afternoon. He looked me right in the eye and then smiled as I walked past. I've figured that he must have thought I was a waitress as I was dressed all in black! Ah well... no broom closet and illegitimate child on the menu for me today...

I'm convinced that I either suffer from a major vitamin deficiency, or I have mild narcolepsy... sleep is just so so taking over every day of my life! HELP!

I

spent some time this weekend with jo jo's family. We took the tube up to Brent Cross and trapsed around a shopping centre with her mum and dad and cousin that was in town visiting... Strangely I almost cried when I walked into the shopping centre... it was quite surreal. The reason being... I live in central London and never encounter large shopping centres... they are very typical of the way things are back home... I've been feeling a little homesick as of late and really wanting to go home for a visit so I guess this just compounded it... so I've not got any deep spiritual connection with large commercial spaces but I guess it's just an odd link to home...

We then left the shopping centre with the pregnant cousin the ex- but now current boyfriend (who's baby it was not that she is carrying), mum and dad... off to the garden pub near jo jo's house. It was such a lovely afternoon. Lots of kids running around the garden... the 2 pints of lager went straight to my head. Then we headed back to jo's house and lounged in the garden sipping white wine... I had forgotten how nice it was to be out of London for a change!

I think I might be going to Amsterdam next week for business and may try and swindle a weekend stay over... perhaps it's the mini break I've been needing... *schemes*

the end is nigh

well at least for this big project it is... I can't wait for things to slow back down again... it's nice to reach a goal.

The weekend is looking like it's going to be great... heading to Canterbury for a little chilling and mostly having fun... I shall write some tales upon my return. *smirk*

I've been eyeing this lovely jumper in this shop near work... I'm so tempted to buy it... I'm going at lunch to visit it... I know I know I'm in South Ken... it's gonna cost a bundle but hey... if I can't afford it, I can always just visit it in the window everyday until the shop assistants get fed up of seeing me drool down the shop window... then just maybe they'll give me one to make me go away?

A girl can dream can't she?

Task number two for the day... take boss to Jimmy Choo shop to check out the sale... lord knows I could never afford anything but she can... *shopping by proxy* always a viable option non?

sweet

sweet sweet karma baby... what goes around comes around...

last night...

I dreampt of the
metro in lyon. It was a strange dream that involved a bit of anxietry, frustration, failing memory and flashed of all things that were part of my life when I lived in Lyon... including this mad Irish pub near the large shopping centre (which doesn't exist in real life). I wonder what on earth this dream means and where it came from?

I enjoy work so much more when it's busy like this... make you mind sharp... it's when all the political bs starts getting in the way that it all goes pear-shaped.

I was really hoping to fly home in Sept. for a holiday but the flights are inordinately expensive... will save my pennies for xmas... maybe go to France instead perhaps that's maybe what my dream was telling me!?

today is just mental busy here at work

had a fun chat with the lovely Tiago this morning ... i'm all hopped up on a mocha frappachino from Starbucks... I'm so buzzing!

Looks like it's going to be a late one... I'm supposed to go help sally with some canvases in her studio tongiht... doestn' look like I'll make it.

KJ and mum jet off to San Fran today to sail with Auntie Jean. I wish I was going with them as I adore sailing... I should have been born with money let me tell you! I would do it proud.

How brilliant is the new radiohead album? very let me tell you!

now i'm

miffed... no tumbling classes for 6 weeks! that sucks... my neck... damn it! I'll wait two and then go... I want to play!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The heat continues to oppress ol' London town... this is supposed to be the last scorcher for a while so thank goodness...sleep at night was beginning to be a huge challenge... and that's bad as I am the QUEEN of sleeping!

My morning commute has be confirmed at a solid 30 mins (if I leave at 8h15) sweet. Much better than the hour and fifteen that I was pushing prior to my move. Sweet sweet clerkenwell.

Dan and Sal are off to Vietnam on Sunday. How exciting for them... I know nothing of that country other than the imagery I've seen from the war... very green... Can't wait to hear of their adventures!

The party on Friday was great fun but was unbearably hot in our flat... met our new neighbour from upstairs who just bought the penthouse... never in my days have I seen such a nice flat! 270 degree view of London from a massive massive balcony... sweet woman too... she owns a flower shop of all things... perhaps I can learn something from her and one day own my own flower shop in some hot country. She must be doing something right if she's got a 600, 000£ flat!

Saturday in Brighton was good fun, it was a lovely chill day... much better than London pride... and it was free! I'm a big gayed out right now... but it was fun!

Back to the salt mines I suppose... we're approaching our infamous deadline... bring it on. quickly, please?

note to self

starting out a friday morning with a 7h15 physio apt. is not at all a nice thing to do. All I can say is ouch!

our flat warming party is this evening and should be fun but sweaty (dont' get the wrong idea...) I simply mean that it's so warm here in London right now. Miss Dearbhla will be away in Belfast but it will be nice to see some friendly faces!

Work is still on lock down which sucks... I don't know if they could possibly be crueler... it's August for goodness sake... the month were everyone takes time off!

Off to Brighton on Sat. if the trains allow... should be the 'hottest day of the year' they say... I say- bring it on!

i wish

i had an excuse... so many people have taken the summer off from blogging... curse them! However over the past few days I've been so swamped that I've not had a second to write anything down.... Alas I am no better than them!


time should fly when you're busy at work... but when you loathe what you're doing it doesn't help much... fleeting moments are spent by me day dreaming up a job that pays the same but doesn't require me to do what I do here... something that I love to do would be ideal... at this point I know if Mark is reading this he'll be sighing saying something like *hello, sarah... get your BBC production ideas together and start pitching*

maybe i'll just do that!

reducing the space and time between wanting and doing...

It's kind of funny sometimes, as I keeps stats on my blog... I can see who drops by and visists even if they don't leave comments... it's even funnier when people tell you that they've not read your blog in months and you can see right there in black and white that they have :) makes me chuckle...

We're having our big flat warming party this weekend. Should be a hoot... If I've forgotten to invite you and you're in town let me know.

Circus school again tonight... going to brave the hard class again tonight... I'm stoked... weather I'll be able walk tomorrow is another question entirely!

Celebrity Bingo

continues... I walked right by her outside my office at lunch today...

but she had been tangoed*

*tango- referring to the orange soft drink that they sell here in the UK... coined by Luke, referring to someone with an overly orange tan

I am in love!

with my tumbling class... i went to the level lower last night and it was too easy but was nevertheless fun! It's amazing how tricks just start coming back! It's like riding a bicycle. I had such and incredible buzz when I finished the class... not so handy when the class finishes at 10pm but hey... no complaints here

I think the nice weather just may return to o'l London town... They're calling for a warm sunny weekend and a promising next few weeks *fingers and toes crossed* I guess it will be a small consolation of sorts as I'm not able to go on holiday with my seestor and my mother to San Fran to go sailing on my auntie's boat :( It's so cruel that my work has us on lock down... my heart is broken into a million pieces...

I think this exploding dog cartoon found by my boss yesterday (and subsequently used on the front page of one of her briefs...) is kind of how I feel about not being able to go to san fran...

This

is my favorite new website... mUncH a S Lut at YOMiko.com. ... .. You must play the amputee fridge magnet game! Brilliance thy name is yomiko!

The weekend was fab. Very busy but fun!

The wine show in Olympia on Friday night was a good laugh. Made it home in about an hour on a random bus that I caught... Was very strange as I NEVER ever venture about west London... it's kind of like visiting a different city. When I got home I collected Jojo, Sally and Tim and headed to the flat... We stopped in at our downstairs neighbours party... it's always interesting to see what other people's places look like especially when you've both got the same flat!

Saturday morning showed some promise of sunshine... after an immense amount of faffing by someone that will remain nameless... we finally headed towards Hyde Park. Within 30 minutes of mincing in the champagne area we were 40£ lighter and one bottle of champers heavier... then the heavens opened. It wasn't too bad as there were many dance tents and they were quite large. We all laughed and danced and had lots of fun. We were all heading back home by 8h30 which was fine by me as I was exhausted!

Sunday morning I headed down to Brighton accompanied by miss wood. Met up with my sister and my cousins. Had a nice lunch and was generally windswept in a most proper manner... it was madness! The wind off the sea was almost enough to blow you off your feet.

I'm really hoping my friend Karm lands that job he went for a Microsoft yesterday... and also hoping that Sean lands that job at the home office that he applied for! How cool would that be? Oh yea, very!


KJ is back in the UK on Friday but only for 18... however as we're all on lockdown here at work, it doesn't look like I'll be able to see her... very sad really, as this is most likely her second but final trip to London this year...


I missed circus school yesterday as the class I wanted was at 18h15! dang! I think I might brave the advanced one again tonight .
Did I mention all the fabulous pressies my seestor and my mum sent for me? I think I'm the luckiest Jarrett in the world!

There are lots of pictures... email me or leave me a comment if you want to see :)

letter to the landlord from the flat part 1

Dear Mr Sha

It's been nearly one full week since we last chatted. The new tenants have moved in. Goodness do they ever have a lot of stuff! But you would be most proud as they've carefully placed pieces of felt on the bottoms of their potentially damaging furniture so as to protect my delicate wooden floors.

I watched the blond one read instructions on how to use the dishwasher... good thing she did or else she wouldn't have known to add salt to the first wash. Then I saw the brown haired one consult the washing machine instructions so as to know where to put the fabric softener.... You would be so proud of them!

I've got a sneaking feeling that they're planning on wall mounting this beautiful painting brought over by one of their friends... as the one girl with the longer hair was running a stud detector along the wall... then I noticed her re-charging a drill! I'm quite frightened as I've not had anything like this done to my walls before!

I hear you are planning to visit me on Sunday as you forgot to give the ladies a key to one of the bedroom windows. I can't wait to see you again and show you all the neat things they've done to me!

Yours truly,

the flat apt. 307

ps. the girls were speaking of how you call each of them individually at work on Tuesday to make sure that I was okay. You're so sweet, always worrying about me!

I've been

home being mostly sick.. I just can't shake this cold... so I've resolved to just let it win, and agree to be sick forever more...

I have however had the chance to unpack my room and fit everything in!

I must say that our new bathtub is heaven.

This weekend is jam packed... wine festival friday. Pride Saturday... Brighton to meet up with seestor on Sunday...

once upon a time

I had this lust thing with this bloke... yea yea it was a bloke... he was young... it was one weekend it was a blast... nothing that I wanted as it was terribly impossible due to a millions of reasons... just a few minutes ago I got this message from him out of the blue... god it was hilarious... I don't' think I could have any less interest in the fragmented conversation with him if I tried... god, I really am as old as I am supposed to be. I've really got to thank him though as I was terribly close to losing consciousness at my desk and his messenger woke me up! Guess there is always a good side to things like this... back to my big gay world now...

the move went well... was very tiring but it's done and that's what matters. Now it's time to unpack and compact life into a much smaller flat.

henceforth I will begin to feature a special segment that I will call 'letters from the flat to Mr Sha' it will be a journal-esq collection of thoughts and messages from our new flat to it's owner... who seems to have a very vivid passion for his flat... Just to give an example, he insisted (and then with great glee) spent 2h on Saturday morning flipping through the owners manual and page by page reading out it's entire contents! It made us all lose the will to live! So as an ode to the landlord/owner (complimented by his phone call to all three of us this morning to make sure the move went well and that we've set up all our bills) I'm going to commence a series of letters on behalf of the flat so that they can keep in touch throughout the tenancy. Oh how sweet they will be. Stay tuned!

Kaffin arrives this Sunday! I'm meeting her in Brighton. Friday night is the wine festival with work peeps and Saturday is pride...but not sure yet if i'm even going to go as there don't seem to be many tickets left and I seem to be living very far from where one can procure them... and I'll be damned if I'm paying lastminute.com's outrageous 3£ postage plus 4£ admin fee!

So I guess I'll be sitting at home then!

bizarre quirks

everyone's got'em the strange thing is that a lot of them are totally unconscious to the beholder. I've mad a list of a few of mine... feel free to add to the list

-writing in all lower case with very little regard (if any) to punctuation along with a terribly embarrassing inability to spell

-the inability to close twist lids firmly (this involves anything from toothpaste to bottle tops) Christie flagged me on this one when we were living on Lewis st.

-the need to walk on the same side of the road of my destination

-the lack of self restraint to not be able to open a weekly TV listing and not read every single east enders update

-how I stroke my throat and collar bone with my right hand when I'm nervous

Tonight i'm heading to some promotional/launch night with my friend Hon and his brother at Pop in Soho... all I know is that it involves free beer and polish vodka... perhaps that will kick my cold once and for all?

Now all I need is a plan that will get me from half ten to 18h with the least amount of pain and the most amount of productivity...

i'm mostly...

liking my entry for today's oneword.: "Go west on the road that veers to the clouds... where the sky dips down and you can taste heaven perfectly... ask Tori, she knows all too well."

j'ai mal à la gorge!

c'est impossible car c'est l'été... je ne veux pas être malade :(

the weather has been fantastic but alas I'm locked in the office... I can imagine that the heat will definitely stay until we move next Monday... I excel at consistently moving on the hottest day of the year... some would call it a gift... others would call me an unlucky mare.

Poor Neil, our designer got knocked off his motorbike on the way home last night... dislocated shoulder and suspected broken arm. It's so yucky. I hope he's okay... I've never been a big fan of motorcycles stemming from my father's accident... It's not the bikes that are the problems it's the motorists who consistently don't pay attention and run them down.

Spooks was great last night.... I really enjoy that program!

best feign working for a while as I was suuuuuuuper late this morning...

you know...

I think I've been remarkably quiet about my whole break up... the only trace of the actual event lies in some comments left by her in my comments a few weeks back. I think I'm a fair person and have an enormous amount of room in my heart for moving on and trying to stay positive... I don't hate or resent her. It was not working, we were not happy, it had to end. I have not slung about blame and pointed fingers and been spiteful and all of those easy but wrong things that people do when the part company with their partners... in fact I can clearly say that I do a lot of times miss her company... miss the good times... but am very aware that those memories are all in the past... this is very apparent to me today...

money is evil... it makes every break up even harder... being out of love and subsequently out of pocket just plain sucks... but that's life... you live, you love, you learn... you make similar mistakes... you repeat the cycle... you laugh you cry...

it was really nice to read about how David and Markus were able to meet up for the first time post their break-up... all in due time I suppose... but distance certainly has it's place. Distance is difficult as it comes with time... and time is eternally slow in healing hearts after break-ups...

my advice to me? life is really good right now. smile and enjoy it.

ten minutes...

left in this day here at the office and there has been little time to even think. For some odd reason it's become uber busy here....

the pain in the legs from tumbling on Tuesday has peaked today as pain often does (two days post exercise) I'm walking around like a wobbly peg-leg woman... this is all too familiar... this is the part of tumbling that I had forgotten *creak*

It's been a glorious day almost 30 degrees which is very hot for these parts! Too bad I missed it all sitting inside. Miss Dearbhla and I are meeting tonight to catch up on things. It's been ages since we last caught up! Hopefully we can find somewhere nice with a terrace to soak up the remains of the day.

Got news that our credit checks all passed and that the flat is officially ours! Not that we were doubting it but it's re-assuring nonetheless. *hobbles away*

celeb spotting...

My boss and I walked by Mini Driver today during lunch... Yes she's quite tall but had brushed out her lovely curly hair and was looking slightly worse for wear...

Tumbling class last night was an absolute fab time. I went to the intermediate class on a whim as I had messed up the date of the beginner intermediate class... I wasn't the worst in the class but I was certainly not even close to the one bloke who could do full tumbling passes including back layouts! I can still do no handed cartwheels... It was such a great workout, we were all dripping with sweat... just like back when I used to take gymnastics class... I really had fun at the end when we did front tucks and layouts off of the trampoline on the big squishy mat. Next week I'm going to the beginner intermediate class to brush up on my back 'flicks' as they call them here... 'handspring' as we call them in Canadia. I'm absolutely besotted by this class, I never thought I could have this much fun at my age!

T-12 days till our move to our new flat. I can't wait. Moving sucks but the new place is so lovely... I think the housewarming party will be around the 8th of Aug... Sean get your arse over here!

YOU ARE WEAK YOU ARE BLUBBER!

I got the funniest orientation email for the nike fun run from my chosen trainer... you can read it here.

work has been mad... at least time is passing quickly.

Mummy is off to Halifax with the grandparents today... They hope to make it to PEI too. Mum promised to visit the interactive kiosk we made back at Filament that is in the confederation museum there... That was such a great project to work on! I miss stuff like that!

I'm supposed to go to my first drop in tumbling class tonight (if I can make it home to change in time) youpie!!!!!!!!

welcome...

to my updated links... these are all the people that i visit daily... enjoy...

Manolos?

So trying to make the best of our new location... my boss and I ventured down the road to the Manolo Blanik shop at lunch... We arrived and looked in the window... it was looking suspiciously like the type of place you needed and appointment to enter... we quickly psyched ourselves out and aborted the mission... perhaps we'll brave it later when we're looking a little less topshop and a bit more bond st. (erm... that would be never!)

The weekend was fun. Hung out with some peeps at Soho pride... not that I'm one for rainbow flag waving malarky... this was far from it... It was a nice chill afternoon.

I had a great chat with my sis and my mum on Sunday afternoon... I then witnessed a funny conversation at the bus stop when I was heading into angel... a girl was chatting with her boyfriend and they were discussing the most important people in her life... I listened as she went over and over 'my priorities are god, then me' the guy kept insisting that he should be included on her list... she was adamant that it was just her and god that were eligible. Hilarious... It's interesting to hear people discussing religious beliefs in such an urban neighbourhood.

I really really...

like this site it's a great little daily writing exercise... I'm far from brilliant but some of the entries are just terrible.

some days just will never end... this is one of them. Went to Harvey Nic's at lunch (guided there by Tasha) I'm so out of my bearings around this part of town... Almost got run over by a Bentley on my way back to the office and just when I thought I was safe a Rolls Royce nearly got me... I tell no lies.

This weekend should be eventful... busy busy.

Happy Yankee day...

so yea my blogging has been short as of late

but some things don't require many words

one of those things is a comment uttered by our designer in our production meeting we had on Tuesday... he was speaking of this new navigation system that they're trying to bodge...

'for a three legged dog, it's got a real shiny nose'

I leave you with that!

*laughs*

Oh...

how the smallest things can change your life... I just need to say how much I LOVE Vanilla diet coke!... now where can i find me some diet cherry coke?

it could get...

worse... the commute in the morning is worse than imagined... long, hot... squished...

At lunch today I walked up to the Chelsea Holmes Place to see if I was going to switch my membership over to there... HA! It's a dive. It's got a lovely pool but the rest of the place is small with low ceilings, narrow corridors... It's amazing how branding can make rich people go there even though it's clearly crap. So now I'm clean out of options... unless I leave my membership at Holmes place and join a new club near here... pay the ridiculous joining fee... god it makes me want to not be healthy. Well not quite but it sure makes life difficult!

The circus school orientation was brilliant. What fun! I think I'm going to go to one of the drop in tumbling classes next week... I also liked the balance stuff they showed us as well... Eventually once I have some money again *laughs--- we all know that will never happen* I'm going to take a trampoline class!

Here is a pic that the lovely Natasha took of me this morning... you'll see the glory of our new office... look my desk is almost clean!

Happy Canada Day everyone... and, Happy Birthday Duffy Denise!

"have a nice night..."

I said to the Indian man working in the shop where I picked up some things on my way home last night... It was one of those strange shops in Dalston that sells mainly African beauty products... He responded in the most peculiar way... with a great sadness in his voice. 'but i'm alone'. Don't get me wrong, we wasn't at all saying it in a tone where he was subversely looking for some company in me! No, he truly was lonely. I responded... ' you're only as alone as you feel' like hello? Sarah? that makes no sense... I was trying to say something nice and sympathetic but it came out all wrong... Being alone is strange after you've had a partner for a while... it's like getting to know yourself all over again... it's hard work but worth it. I wish I could have said something more clever to him.

We've found a flat! It's just south of Angel in Barnsbury... really nice flat. We move on the 21st! I'm so glad all that flat hunting is done. More info later... as I truly can not be arsed to go through all the hoo ha. Plus perhaps it's best that I not write the exact location of my flat on the blog....

I had a moment of trauma this morning as I signed away 75£ to the man at the tube station... Signing away my fate to travel by tube every morning to this new office. I'm having major culture shock as it's just so posh here it's impossible to describe. Ladies who lunch are everywhere... GUCCI accross the road and Joseph on the corner... there is no lack of swish shops and such in this area. The new office it's self is nice and bright and they've re-arranged where everyone sits, so it's interesting. The air con is brutal and we're all freezing to death!

I'm off to circus school orientation tonight. I hope to do some of the tumbling classes they offer... I can't wait! I feel kind of nutty after this day... I wish every work day started at 11am rather than 9am!

when...

my mobile grows up... it wants to be this! *drools* now just how sexy is this phone... anyone got a spare 200£ to buy me one? Please feel free...

okay...

so the caffeine has kicked in... I don't usually drink coffee at work... but today my 15h drowsiness was unbearable!

I know I've mentioned it before but the sun rises so early here in the summer that It freaks me out. I bolted awake at 4h45 this morning thinking I had slept the day away. Turns out I hadn't it was just the daylight outside that confused me. London almost gets 2.5h extra hours of daylight compared to Seville. And nearly an entire hour more than Toronto... We be proper northerly

The flat hunt is still as dismal as it's been all along... Pushy twatty estate agents that insist that we need to live in hoxton as it's the only area with suitable unfurnished flats... What part of WRONG LOCATION do they not understand? Grrrr. Seeing one more place tonight in the right location... bet ya its' going to be a dump!

Going biking on Saturday with my co-worker Luke. I can't wait. It will be a nice change to cycle somewhere else other than central London!

*scurries back to work*

The weekend was filled with many an ouch and lots of hilarity...

I met up with the lovely Hon for lunch on Friday afternoon... Then Micha after work. We had a few drinks in Shoreditch and then headed home.

There was lots of sunning to be done on Saturday morning as our gracious neighbours decided to come home at 6am and crank their music. Nice. Went to view a flat in the afternoon... then a picnic on the green.

Saturday night met up with the lovely miss Dearbhla and finally got to give her her b'day pressie. Lots of wine ensued and the evening ended in the jazz bar followed swiftly spilling onto the concrete when foolishly giving my friend a piggy back. My knee is most likely broken (okay so I exaggerate but still) it hurts like an SOB! I'm still wobbling around today... if it's not better by mid week I'll get it x-rayed but i'm not a big fan of 10h waits in the A&E of UCL...

Sometime during the night the funniest thing happened... Jo jo's friend Sally managed to wander into Dan and Sally's room (wrong turn from the loo perhaps) and ended up waking up in the morning in their bed. I can't imagine the thoughts going through Dan and Sal's heads when they saw a stranger in their bed that they most definitely did not have in their bed when they got in it. One can only attribute it to sleep walking. It was nothing short of hilarious!

Sunday in a hung over haze I went and did something really adventurous... okay well in my book it is... Sean you're familiar with this activity as you've done the same thing in the past... Ouch!

Work today is mental busy and as I write it's 17h20 and I've not even stopped for lunch... feeling very hungry now... our office moves on Friday which means that we only work a half day... then again a half day on Monday too! Not that it makes the fact that we're moving to south Kensington any easier... but I've got to find something positive about it.

so I had to edit my posting yesterday

so that my friend dan's natzi-esq browser security at work will let her view my site... apparently I must writ p with and orn rather than the full word... well I'll be darned

went to see another flat last night... this one in the perfect location... nice size, bright, great quiet residential street... only one small problem... the second room in the flat was the size of a small storage cupboard... there is no way a double bed would have fit in there. So frustrating...

I watched a brilliant program on the bbc last night... it's about career change... it watched the life of a welsh farmer who decided he wanted to be an interior designer... it was heartbreaking and touching all at the same time... it's a good replacement for my other favorite program 'no going back'... the week previously they followed a baker of 30 years on his path to become a funeral director. Simply brilliant... and the best part was... that they both were successful. The Welsh bloke ended up as a cabinet maker for a high end kitchen design company and the Baker landed a job with a funeral company as a trainee funeral director (which would eventually provide him with a much heftier salary than he was earning as a Baker) Life is about well calculated risks and following your dreams.... these people have such spirit it's infectious.

it's a grey Thursday but Friday is not far off now. I'm counting the minutes.

after a long and well deserved break...

I was back a the gym this morning... nothing much had changed... the amount of theft from lockers in the changing room is apparently reaching epidemic rates... not nice.... the leather skinned 80lbs anorexic lady was there as per usual sweating and grunting and crunching away at what's left of her... however, new this morning... was an absolute vision of beauty on the treadmill.... toned, lovely... tanned... quite a bit of eye candy! Then later in the locker room as I was getting changed I noticed that she was too... now this is not going to turn into a 'p' with an 'orn' moment so don't' get excited... To my utter shock I noticed that this perfect specimen was stepping into possibly the mumsiest clothes I've seen a long long time. Large granny blouse, high-wasted trousers... and granny sandals. How could this be? yea yea, well I've got to find excitement in my life where I can...

work has been manic but good. keeping busy keeps life simple... or so that's the theory that I'm going with...

The first day of flat hunting was an astounding flop... I saw a tiny, hot dark carpeted place 5 minutes walk to Angel... I can't believe the estate agent wasted his time showing me that!?!?! What's even more incredible is that they wanted 350£ a week for it! The next place was beautiful, 4th floor, modern all mod cons... a bit on the sterile side... gorgeous view of the city...but again the neighbourhood was so so and really at the end of the day now what's on the cards... The hunt is supposed to resume this evening but I'm not too sure if that's going to happen.

I'm really starting to seriously think about this Spain thing... sooner rather than later...

avis aux liseurs... ne m'approcher pas, sans avoir lu les directions...

My room....

is now a shrine to cleanliness... okay so my sock bins are still not organized but everything else is dusted washed and cleaned... It's amazing how much junk I've accumulated since I moved to London nearly 2 years ago!

Got a letter from miss Denise today... I can't believe she'll be back in Ireland soon. A year of travelling sure when by quickly for her! I wonder if she's going to end up moving across the pond to work in London once she's settled?

Did some flat hunting over the weekend and I'm going to look at a place after work tonight. After yet another weekend of noise I'm about at the end of the tether... At this this time one of the landlords came round at 3am to demand the music be turned off. Surprisingly enough it wasn't the arseholes next door... it was the people on the second floor in the other block of flats!!!!!!!!

Work is very busy, and before you know it, it will be next Friday and we'll be out of this office. My story of air-conditioning relief was short live... they've turned them on here and it's terrible my throat has been sore all day long and i'm shivering in my jumper when it's freaking 26 degrees outside. I HATE IT!


Had a nice drink last night at the firefly in Stoke Newington last night... yummy long Island Iced tea! That part of town was such a buzz last night! Live jazz is brilliant!

Just found out today that my friend Lisa who is expecting (she's such a dear friend she's like my other sister) well, she's having a boy! She'll have a right nuclear family! One boy and one girl. I'm so pleased for her and her husband.

I was actually almost on time to work this morning!

I was greeted by a lovely email in my inbox from my friend charlotte in Ottawa. It's simply been ages since I was last in touch with her! She is full of joy and fun as always and keeping busy with her dogs and her lovely husband! Bless!

It's a gorgeous day and I'm wearing girlie shoes... bought them in Spain for a whopping 14euros... they're purdy! Gosh it's not often I wear heels but these ones are comfy in that they are wedges... man oh man does the world ever look different from this height! Yea I know... get a life Sarah.

I arrived home last night to a new flat mate... his name is rattus henry II... He's so sweet. Yea yea so we can't have a dog or a cat but this little guy is sweet. Dan is the proud mum and stayed up late into the night playing with him.

*scurries off*

and I was ridin' by
ridin' along side
for a while till you lost me
and I was ridin' by
ridin' along till you lost me
till you lost
me in
The Rear
View
you lost me
I said
way up North I took my day
all in all was a pretty nice
day and I put the Hood
right back where
You could taste heaven
perfectly
Feel out the summer breeze
didn't know when we'd be back
And I I don't
didn't think
We'd end up like
like this

A Sorta Fairytale- Tori Amos

sooo

i'm back from the land of the sun. Had a lovely time in Sevilla and prospects look surprisingly good. For professional and personal reasons I shall not post all the details of my visit here, as it may be more trouble than it's worth... needless to say, life is full of surprises. It's strange to be back in London, I quickly grew accustomed to the sun, and now that there is none I feel so disjointed!

I got to spend the weekend with Siobhan and Hugo. It was manic as they were working driving mule carriages during the el rocio. the best part was is that she was working for this hotel which is absolutely gorgeous... Swimming in that pool was pure heaven!

I've got pictures but as blogger is rather naughty when you try and publish pictures... you'll have to write to me if you want to see them.

Work is mad busy and I managed to get some things done this morning... this afternoon however, seems much less fruitful as I'm writing this rather than working.

ici je reve de l'audela par me sens inconscients

pretty oh so pretty

bike rides, sun tanning and corona

fell asleep like a trooper on Friday night 10pm I was zzz on the sofa. And who says I'm a party animal??? I woke up bright and early on Saturday 7h30! Jumped on my bike... stopped at the Euphorium bakery and picked up a freshly baked pain au chocolat and an iced tea and went along my merry way down to kings cross... then along the canal to Camden... then to regent's park (which is absolutely stunning... god why have I never been there before? I work 2 mins from there!) stopped soaked up the sun and ate my brekkie. Then I rode to the bike shop near my work and bought a new saddle which is immensely more comfortable than the one that came with the bike... Then I continued along up towards Kensington and around green park. God it was just so lovely. Being on your own like that is so good for the mind and does allow for much mental irrigation... the nice weather really does brighten your spirit. Perhaps that's why the Spaniards are so happy all the time? At 11 I rang jo jo and dragged her out of bed and we sat in Islington green having iced coffees. Met up with the girls for lunch at the living room then biked home did some laundry and rested.

Sunday was for sun tanning and then a trip to spittalfields market... met up with Dan and jo and jo's friend who's name I always forget... had a few coronas and watched the market pack up for the day. Some really nice stuff there... Good ideas. I'm going to make some really cool neck ribbon-like things made from old neck ties and buckles... very cool idea but the girls who had made them had them priced at 20£ which was extortionate... sorry but at a 5£ I would have bought two but they were asking just too much.

Stopped by the embassy later on where I met up with jo jo again and sally and jo's friend Lisa (who is such a doll) and her boyfriend who was in town from Wales... had a few drinks and some laughs then I headed home. The rain at 3am was amazing. such heavy rain is so exotic.

Short week for me... Wednesday can't come soon enough. I only wish I could bring my bike with me to Seville. Ah well.

do di doo

I got a lift to Kings Cross this morning as Miss B was running late. It was so glorious outside that I decided to walk the rest of the way in... and the fact that I was then so early that I would be at work at 8h15 if I took the bus! I walked all the way... though the polluted streets and it was surprisingly pleasant. I stopped off at a little café just near to my office and had some marmite on toast (god love this country) and a bottle of water and soaked up the rays...

then at 9am I arrive at work

and there are a zillion things wrong with the weather application we built... Okay not a zillion but two... two more than anyone wants to deal with on a Friday morning....

however

clever Amazon sent me a mail letting me know that this... was now available... yea yea so I'm probably the last to know but how excited am I? Sadly Amazon will not get my business as the instant satisfaction of visiting HMV at lunch down on Oxford street will prove much more fruitful.

I went to bed early last night after having a very relaxing bath... only to be greeted by what can only be described as carnival-like noise levels in the courtyard. It was like standing between two different rides playing equally offensive music... everyone's windows were open. It was nothing short of torture. Thank goodness that my ability to sleep rescued me from this terror and I made it though the night without killing any of my twatty neighbours. I will miss my flat when we move but I certainly won't miss the noise!

Production meeting in the park this afternoon... sounds like a really good idea. Lets just see if we can muster up the gumption to pull it off... the boss is away so...

this morning there is a lovely breeze flowing in through the window that I sit next to...

i'm so happy to be free of air conditioning... that's one think I really hated about working in an office back in Canada... their insistence that the fact that it's freezing for 8 months of the year isn't enough... and that it's customary to freeze all employees during the summer months as well. I'll never understand that one...

I had a really really good chat last night with my friend Mark. I've not spoken to him in ages and he gave me some really sound advice... and some really positive ideas to work towards... Some things to think about and just some really nice support. He's such a top bloke! Even after I got off the phone with him I went and wrote some stuff down just so as I wouldn't forget. I'm looking forward to going to Seville next week, but I've resolved in my mind that it's going to be more of a mini-holiday on my own... more so than anything else. I think I should send him a really fun present from London... hmmm *off to spittafileds I shall trott*

work is quiet as our NL counterparts are all off today for ascension day... most of them have tomorrow off as well making theirs a four day weekend. Good for them... they know how to celebrate their antiquated catholic holy days!

please welcome a new blogger to the world!

*said in theme park voice*
thank you and enjoy the rest of your day here at Canada's Wonderland

i can't imagine that...

it's possible for me to be more distracted than I am today... the sun has come out for the first time in what seems like an eternity. My mind is fluttering and work is just not on the agenda

I finally found a place to stay in sevilla and then realized that I've got no freaking credit card to make the booking. damn it. what a pain in the arse... I forgot about this. Why don't I have a credit card again? hmm dunno? oh yes, i remember... it's because they're eeeeeeeeevil!

As part of my gentle induction into tube travel I took it again this morning... *shudders* oh wait... we got paid today... yipee!

Perhaps some strawberry tea might kill some time...

gosh sean's blog is tres drole as of late!

this morning on my way to the gym...

I passed one of the 'working girls' who was standing on the corner a block away from my flat... she was wearing a cowboy outfit... complete with little fringed skirt and hat that was dangling from a string and hanging down her back. This is a very new marketing initiative, by either her or her pimp (assuming she has one). As I walked by I gave her a meak smile... she is human after all I can't just pretend she doesn't exist. She responded with a very timid 'hello' I looked her in the eyes and tried to give a very quick but reassuring greeting back to her... and I kept on walking. The poor thing. She couldn't be older than 16... My heart broke into a million pieces for her. I mean, there is no way that she wasn't humiliated by standing around in an outfit like that on a suburban street corner. The world is a yucky place sometimes.

Had a very good work out this morning... detox is definitely on the cards this week as this weekend involved more drinking than biking... although there was biking involved... there was also, cleaning and resting and hangovers... Saw Jo jo and her sister on the weekend too which is always fun. Jojo is looking super fly with her very ultra trendy hair style. She can really pull it off. It looks straight from the Vidal Sassoon workshop!

I've booked my flight and I'm very nervous but I'm off to Sevilla again soon... you never know unless you try... and if the meeting doesn't go well... I still have a nice mini holiday! I think getting old must be making me go a bit soft as doing something like this in the past wouldn't have fazed me one bit... but then again my life has been pretty hectic as of late so that can't help.

Meeting up with the lovely Micha tonight to hear all about her loved up holiday in Thailand! T'will be a non alcoholic meeting for me! *heh*

either the fates are too busy to measure my piece of string...

or they've done it so quickly that it's been unrolled, measured, snipped and sent in an express envelope... no word back from my deluge of emails... maybe it's just me not seeing things in a more relaxed way... it will take time and patience... it's a different world over there.... not as zap boom pronto as things are here...

another grey day... I think it's been like this every day since I've been back. I'm hoping the weather can at least help it's self from pissing down with rain tomorrow as I'm out to test out my new London cycle guide and on Sunday... I hope to mostly be doing the same thing. Hopefully it will be cost effective.

random question...
are cranberry's and black current's in any way related?

Had a good chat with Dan last night. It's always nice to get someone else's perspective on my desire to move to Spain.

relaxing weekend ... (long weekend!) here I come!

what a strange night

nope I wasn't up late watching American HBO programming... I went to bed at 11...

at 1h30 in the morning I bolted awake... no apparent reason or impetus... Now, sleep to me is one of my most natural things... I fall asleep very easily (sometimes too easily) and it never takes me more than 5 mins. I never wake in the night and generally sleep through most disruptions... Thus why awaking at 1h30 was so very strange to me.

Sometime in the night or this morning I had this very vivid dream... I was in my elementary school... In the corridor just in front of the gym, when for some reason I realized I was with my friend Brad from Ottawa... He leaned in to kiss me and I stopped him... I then took out my retainer... chucked it in my pocked and then went back in for the snog. How odd is that? what on earth could that mean?!?!?!

It's clearly not Friday yet and my morning gyming sessions have been yet again replaced by post work biking sessions. I'm in love with stationary bike number 7... oh yes... it's official.

I stumbled upon the most jammy website yesterday... it lists all the digital communication company's in Seville. I mean, how freaking lucky was that? 23 emails later I sit and wait... watching the fates unwind, measure and cut the fabric that is my destiny... well that sounds a little dramatic... but any time now folks!

well well well

what can I say?

some things are easier to predict than others... *smiles*

one of the unpredictable things is... that I scored a meeting with a company in Seville... now it's just up to me to haul ass over there and hopefully round up a few more meetings to make it a worthwhile journey. I don't think I'll manage to arrange it while Siobhan is available so it will be a real baptism by fire If I'm in the city on my own... Next mission is getting time off of work!?!?!? that will be the most difficult of all seeing as it's very busy here of late....

It's hump day.... middle of the week... little sleep due to the sopranos last night. Gosh this series if finally getting good! The first few episodes were such snoozers!

Spooks is coming back soon... six feet under starts again on Sunday... and *mutters* big brother starts on Friday I think these are arguments that stand up on their own as to why I shouldn't move!

I am at a loss...

I refuse to give up writing my blog simply due to the fact that someone is insisting on barraging my comments with their reflections and accusations. Break-ups are never easy but there is a very fine line between not letting go and harassment. Ah well. I guess I have not choice but to just go on and hope that one day soon it will stop.

Had a super busy weekend... Caught up with Dearbhla... whom sadly lost her job. It's a blessing in disguise we hope as she's so swell I'm crossing my fingers and toes that her and Micha both find new fab jobs in no time. I also caught up with Hon and helped him buy two really pretty necklaces for his gf in Japan :) Partook in Dan's b'day celebrations on Saturday which was a good laugh.

Spoke with Siobhan who's off to Belgium in a few weeks to explore branching her consultancy across to there too! Think I'll head back to Seville at the end of next month and check out some employment possibilities (lol)

James James Robinson Robinson

This morning I received the sweetest email from my friend James in Ottawa. He's so great! We lost touch for a while after I moved but have been in touch off and on over the past few months. He's going through a bit of a rough spell as his little boy is moving out of town with the mother and they'll be about 6 hours away from each other. My heart goes out to him as I know what an amazing father he is to his child and it's sad that he's going to have to be so far away from the little guy. I'm not in touch with many people from back in Ottawa anymore... we're all scattered around the world. It's funny how a few words from him bring me swirling back to the days where we hung out at zahpods before it was over run by all the 'jocks' back in the day where we could queue jump and pop in there leaving our massive winter coats at his place that was next door. The bjork, the stone roses... 'I wanna be adored' ah the fun times we had. I'm fully aware that I broke James' heart when I broke up with him. I know this and I will always feel bad about it. I'm very lucky to still have him as a friend.

it's grey and rainy today and I'm dreaming of Spain.... also realizing that I have to get my arse into conversational Spanish lessons in a hurry if I want to get things in order.

we're off at lunch today for celebratory drinks today to mark the launch of the FR portal that happened while I was away last week. Not particularly in the mood for drinking mid-day. I don't think I'll ever become accustomed to mid day drinking rituals in this country.... it feels too naughty!

I am the complete antithesis of my humour yesterday

I've got a spring in my step ad smile on my face and a glow in my belly. (no i'm not pregnant). Well it would be the immaculate conception if I were... I'll just leave it at that.

My boss is away today and the sun is shining. I'm probably wearing the most dodgy outfit I've put together in a while involving fishnet stockings... high top converse and a red hooded jumper. I feel like a tarted out little red riding hood but I don't care. Now if someone would be kind enough to hook me up with some peeps in Seville for a job then please please please feel free to contact me.

What else is up? hmm lets see. Spoke with Siobhan this morning on messenger and she said the her consultancy is picking up and that she's got another job training and may even have a contact from London shipping over a horse for her to train and compete with... which would supplement her income and strengthen her consultancy name! At this rate she may just need an assistant some time soon! !?!?!?

Sean is still humming and hawwing over his life that's in transition... no amount of bollocking from me seems to make him 'turn it into a positive' as my old boss would say. He'll click on to it. Got better advice for him? Tell him!

tenga un día fabuloso

this day is dragging

I think my hormones are churning... it's the one unholy day of the month where for my sake and for the sake of all those around me I should just be alone! I wish Hazel would just listen to me!

the post holiday bubble didn't burst but it slowly disintegrated in the London smog. The Strawberry tea I'm drinking is calming me a bit but it's not helping me stay awake. Watching the Sopranos on Tuesday night is always a dangerous thing as I get to sleep so late!

today I do not want to re-integrate... I do not want to play well with others *stamps foot*

so as per usual when I have too much to say I think it's best that I just jot down some high points of my holiday... perhaps expanding on them later.

day one
-arriving Thursday and heading straight to Seville and went to the festival. the costumes were so pretty and the whole city was alive! with music and dance. it was truly a wicked night. Trailing around the different casettas
-finding the only public casetta with drag queens... or 'fake women' as Tiago called them... how we managed to do that... I'll never know!
-winding up at a gay bar at the suggestion of one of Tiago's clients (the hilarity comes from the fact that Tiago is not gay) and after the 'fake women' was already a little shaken
-dancing and drinking and laughing till 4am


day 2
-witnessing a bloke have an unfortunate but hilarious incident involving a used condom falling out of his pocket in the middle of the street.
-amazing breakfast in a local restaurant in the Jewish quarter of Seville
-did I mention I'm going to move to Seville?
-drive to a horse ranch for a business chat with a man who simply could not sit still while negotiating with Siobhan... me standing outside desperately trying to rid myself of my white London hue
-bob marley and giggles and deliriousness on the way back to Portugal
-sleeeeeeeeeeep

day 3
-beautiful bbq at Sally and Tony's farm... the weather was amazing
-tan... nope not a chance... still as white as a snowflake
-arrival of Line and Sophie... annouk's cousin and friend and her two babies waalt and daan from Belgium
-girlie giggles

day 4
why can't I remember anything?

day 5
-slept till 11
-there was rain
-yummy Belgian food
-major business planning with Siobhan... building her a consultancy model (which ROCKS btw)
-drink
-gossip
-girlie chats

day 6
-helping Siobhan train her horses and ponies
-learning how to walk a horse... and generally trying to be of assistance... city girl with horses... never a dull moment
-boat ride with Tiago
-drinks
-crying babies
-dizzying amounts of Flemish and Portuguese mixed... I was in language overload


day 7
-more horse training
-trip to badajoz to visit Oopie and Soleil and check on some ponies that Sally has living there
-trip to Carrefour (including the purchase of a lovely pair of red sandals for me and my seestor)
-drinks
-dinner in a local restaurant including more than 11 beers between Sio, Marina and I including food that cost 21 Euros (gasps! how inexpensive!)
-crying babies


day 8
-witnessing a gypsy kid get struck by a car in town... and watching no one help him except Siobhan... I dared not as I couldn't communicate to him but no one else would go near the little guy cause he was a gypsy
-boat trip with annouk, line, sophie, all the kids and some of annouk's relatives
-the most thrilling motorcycle ride of my life wearing nothing more than a mini skirt and flip flops and no helmet. Over bumpy terrain, though olive groves. It was the most terrifying thing but also the most fun/stupid thing I've done in a long long time.
-Hugo landing the job he wanted in Spain (thus securing his ticket out of his limited possibilities of work in Portugal) BIG celebrating for him!

day 9
-lots of sunning and relaxing
-car trip into the Spanish mountains
-buying a huge picnic lunch for under 10 euros for 3 people!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-picnic by the side of the road... playing football, laughing... taking pictures
-stopping random donkey drivers to ask if they had a bourra for sale to mate with Siobhan's Donkey Eeore
-picking up a very old man who was hitching and giving him a lift to his house to help him avoid the heat and the long journey!
-night time trip into Evora with the boys for a friend's b'day party
-controlling my laughter at the age difference and the major language barriers between the kids at the party and me... had a blast anyway
-watching Hugo attempt the pseudo juggling tricks that the hippy girls were doing outside of the cathedral including the wiggling of the hips!
-staying out way too late

day 10
-recovery
-napping
-afternoon bbq
-donkey hair cuts!
-dinner under the stars

day 11
-loading up the car with Hugo to be dropped in Spain at his new job... lots of good byes
-stopping at a festa just on the border and having a beer... lots of lovely Spanish traditional dress and lots of pretty horses...
-noticing that the festa was in the middle of have a mass (and they were serving beer) now mass with booze.... that's a concept!
-honking and every car we passed, waving and laughing!
-did I mention how friendly the Spanish people are?
-lunch with Hugos new boss in a sandy (western looking ) village
-driving along side a massive motorcycle rally along the coast on the way to the airport
-quick check in and immediate boarding and off I was winging my way back to London town.

I'm still a glow from all the wonderful fun I had.

I will surely never forget it!

Thanks Siobhan and Annouk!

i'm back

I have a hundred stories to tell. My holiday has changed the way I look at a lot of things in life and what I want to achieve and where I want to live. I will eventually jot it all down... probably within the next few days... or maybe even today if I can manage.

My company is moving to South Kensington. This is a big shitter. I will have no recourse but to travel by tube to work... something that I have actively avoided for a long time. No matter really, I think some plans are falling into place... the fates are aligning.

I've had an amazing amount of time to think about things in the past few days and have come up with some pretty liberating thoughts... those will also follow in due course...

lets see...
sun glasses - check
sun screen - check
bug repellent - check
bikini - check
passport - check
flip flops - check
toothbrush - check
mobile phone - left at home phew

nothing else is really necessary is it? I'm off to Portugal / Spain...

see ya on the 12th

yea so...

as it goes the pay rise ends up with me making less money than before... (different tax bracket) cruel and unfair! Such is life! I can but laugh it off

bought a new bike over the weekend. it's purdy. Nice to be mobile again... it was/ is still mildly terrifying being on the wrong side of the road... All my road biking reflexes are backwards... At least after cycling for a while I'll gear myself up for one day driving on the 'other' side as I've learned to say... make the mistake of saying 'wrong' side of the road and you risk upsetting peeps. Cycled for 4 h yesterday with lots of stopping and decision making as to which trail to follow... The heath is no place for biking... there are a few trails marked for cyclists but it's predominantly marked with big 'no cycling signs'... didn't seem to stop other people so we scurried along the 'no cycle' paths heading all pedestrians... nothing wrong with that? I can't even begin to describe the discomfort that a new saddle brings to you the day after the first time you use it. OUCH!

The rest of my bonus is going towards a trip to Portugal... I'm very anxious to get out of here as I'm losing steam here at work by the minute... If I don't get out soon they may just be asking me to leave! Just kidding. I found a great flight for Wednesday but was told I can't go then... it was a BA flight too... I really was hoping to not have to fly with the masses (sporting their England jerseys, Reebok trainers, gold hoop earrings carrying portable cd players) alas I think I haven't much choice in the matter now. Ah well. Sio says the sea is already warm... Rain is forecast here for the next few days and apparently well into next week too... can't think of a better reason to jump ship now.

Ah yes... the move, yup looks like I'm moving again. Turns out that after 6 months on a lease we can leave with only a month's notice. The neighbour situation will never improve... when you live next to a sound studio there isn't anything you can do to avoid the noise and the land lords are unable to do anything either so we just decided to feck it and pack up and move someone better. Low and behold, the rental market has serious come down. There are tons of beautiful places in the area I want to live in for even less than we're paying right now... very exciting indeed. I hate moving but it will be nicer to live in a less 'ghetto tastic' neighbourhood and cut some time off of travelling to work.

back to the salt mines I suppose...

Sean...

quick! stop going to the gym and move to london!

oh yes...

it is indeed possible to can your entire afternoon downloading new music to your mini disc... not a good idea but very possible. Not that I would know... no, no of course I would never...

staff meeting/drinks after work tonight... we've got to go to say thanks for the raises and bonus' etc... such low social energies these days so don't' know how long I'll last.

*sings*

'cause there's beauty in the breakdown, so let go, let go, jump in cause it's so amasing, yea... it's alright cause there's beauty in the breakdown'.

dunno if it's just the culmination of things that have been brewing lately...

but i'm wondering if it's possible to be suffering from post traumatic stress / repetitive stress disorder of sorts brought on by our neighbours constant pounding music stemming from their 41h party they threw way back when in March just after they moved in. I think It's a strong possibility. I live in constant apprehension as to when they're going to start blasting their music... and if on the off chance the neighbours on the other side might just join in and crank their stereo at the same time... just for good measure... We suffered a lot of loud music this weekend. On Saturday, I called.... I complained ... they turned it off... but it was 4am... and to be quite honest it's clear that it's not acceptable to even be put in a position where I have to ring them in the middle of the night nor deal with his seedy innuendos about me being 'in bed' when I rang.... we've told the landlord.... they now say that there is nothing that they can do... they say it's hard to get rid of people once they've moved in... surly now that this is their 4th warning from the landlord... that has to count for something? I think my flatmates are getting sick of me getting so upset about it... but you know when something really sets you off it's hard to shake... Now I'm living in fear as I know they've been issued another warning and fear running into them on my way in... I know I shouldn't be so upset... I know it's my home but it's really irking me... and it's not like I'm being the inconsiderate neighbour...

4 day weekends are really great if:

*it stays warm throughout
*someone doesn't die
*you don't have a broken hot water heater for 4 days
*you don't eat too much cheese
*you don't live anywhere near a dj

now this...

is what I call quite good!

for all ye who don't know her... she be the bird who does the vocals on tons of Tricky's albums

I'm taking a bit of a break from all of this...

The comments are gone and I'm checking out for a bit for obvious reasons. It's not fun having your blog turned into a mud slinging arena.

I'll be back once the waters have settled... or pulled me under...

so...

while at the gym this morning I couldn't help but notice this one lady whom I'd seen last week... She's so terribly thin it's hard to explain... she's got a waist that is no more than 19' she's either got a medical problem or a severe eating disorder... She does really really long turns on the treadmill and stepper on the highest levels... She pumps large amounts of weights and pushes herself so hard. It's hard not to watch out of fascination. I know it's none of my business but man oh man... So today I'm sitting there in the gym and completing my work out... and there she is toiling away punishing her 6 stone torso (no exaggeration) and I make eye contact with her (un intentional of course) and I give the reflexive 'oh my god I've been caught staring/being rude) Then I started to think about things in a different way... I'm guessing most people in the gym look at her in disgust as they watch her destroy what's left of her tiny body... but then I thought wait a minute... If she is ill, then who is anyone to judge her? And if she's got a problem... maybe if people were nicer to her she might gain more confidence and maybe confront her problem... I felt a bigger person for working that out...

Then in the mirror I slipped back in to selfish mode and was convinced that she chose the mirror next to mine in the hair dryer room so she could look thinner than me (i.e.. if you want to look thinner hang around people fatter than you ideology) I didn't want to be the fatty! LOL... Okay so yea maybe she stood next to me because I smiled at her (refer to statement above) but I guess 'bitter me' can't always win in my attempt at logical inner dialogue. God i'm so terrible *evil grin*

Brighton this weekend was lovely. It was nice and relaxing... some of the highlights/lowlights were :

-drinking fabulous long island iced teas
-meeting some really nice friendly people (i.e.. the shop keeper whom we convinced to buy one of her own belts cause it was just too fabulous... and she was tiny and probably wouldn't sell it anyways!)
-strolling along the pier
-relaxing on the beach
-witnessing a totally drunk girl throw up on her table at 2pm sat. afternoon! (super gross! it was her b'day)
-great breakfasts at the b&b
-lounging near the pavilion (all good till a HUGE seagull decided to poop right square in the middle of Hazel's back.. EWWW!)
-realizing that both miss H and I sometimes despair about being 'thesbians' *more on that topic another day*

All in all a nice well need break!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY miss Hazel who turned the big 29 today! And consequently has given up smoking :0)

i'm soon to be off...

on a surprise mini holiday with miss h. she's taking me to Brighton this weekend (okay so it's not much of a surprise but you get the gist) I can't wait as I really need to get out of the city and just unwind for a bit. Dang I forgot my camera!

Just got back from having lunch in the pub down the road with Madame jo jo. She's looking well all suited and booted in her new shoreditch hair style! God I really can't stand the smell of smoke anymore... I sit here at my desk and the fumes are just trapped in every fibre of my clothing!

Sean informs me that he's got a lead on my black monochrome allstars in Ottawa... how exciting is that? oh, very very!

I've been to the gym 3 times this week in the morning

what a change... going early really gives me a new spark into being there...and I consequently always end up at work on time :) The only downfall to this is the horrible catty women that are there in the morning.... they are all so prissy and spend so much time in front of the mirrors pruning and prissing... I skipped the drying hair thing this morning to avoid them all... I've never seen so many creams, hair products and instruments, makeup and accessories in my life...

it was snowing this morning! goodness what is the world coming to? Just last week It was 18 degrees and warm...

Lisa sent me the cutest pictures of her baby today, she's getting so big so quickly!

well the sun is out now and the mountain of work that's due for tomorrow is still just that... a mountain.

I on the other hand am wanting to be a river.

one year ago...

to this day my daddy passed away... now I say daddy like a child so does my sister... He was almost always daddy but sometimes dad or father if we were really cross with him. It was quick and imprevue... It still hurts so much sometimes... Solace if found in finding light in life... this morning in my body pump class I gazed out the widow into the beautiful blue sky, and thought... man... if he's out there somewhere I hope he's having a good time.

I'm trying very hard not to cry while I write this... my co-workers already think me mad... but I know I have to jot this down in an effort to bring some sort of catharsis to this part of my life.

Anyone with a dad still here... give them a big hug or a call today... for me, please?

Love is in the air doo dah dum doo dah...

from some subtle rumbling over the Atlantic... me thinks me knows someone having a blogromance.... go get 'em tiger!

April pre-Easter holiday is by no surprise... cancelled due to lack of funding... *sighs* ah well there is plenty of work to do so no matter.

the sun has returned and is here to stay for the weekend. My friend Jacqueline is arriving from Vancouver Island on Sunday. Staying only a day on her way over to India. She's such a doll. I haven't seen her in over 5 years. It's so strange when you meet up with people who live so far away whom you used to be close to... sheer immense trans -Atlantic distance spanning all the way across Canada to the mouth of the Pacific to be exact.

it's Friday and thank god... too much drama this week has made me almost go insane...

however, on a more positive note I'm sporting my new hightop black (sadly not monchrome) trainers...with my black fishnets and long black skirt with sanscript print on the front... I'm well chuffed...

why are grape-nuts called that when there are absolutely no grapes involved? Has anyone else ever noticed that the raspberry on the front of the package is doing a physically impossible milk splash? I mean who could have possibly art directed that... it's totally unbelievable... and just who is that lowest denominator person they say will be enticed by this faux portrayal of this raspberry's descent on to the spoon full of grape nuts? God, I seriously must get a life.

Congratulations!!!!!!!!!

Miss H on landing a fab new job!

I'm so happy for you!

I simply didn't want to blog today

but like a child having a tantrum I am forcing myself to get over it and just write god damn it.

The grey day has cleared and brought sunshine to us last in the day. It's great that It's still light when I leave the gym at night. I was home just as the sky turned my favorite colour of deep dusk blue. I love it when night is falling.

Work has been mental, I'm getting a lot of work done but It's strenuous... Although I speak fluent French it's been a long time since I've used it so much at work. I'm training and organizing a French team in Paris including troubleshooting and task management..... it's a tall order in any language but it's good to feel like I'm using my brain. The only downfall is spending donkey's years adding in all the freaking accents into my correspondence alt 130, alt 133, alt 138... god every three seconds I have to pause to add in the freaking accents... at least when I write to my French friends I can omit all the accents and pleas laziness... ah well It's all good.

Sent KJ the picture of the Flamenco painting I bought her and she was just thrilled. I'm well chuffed about that!

I finally bit the bullet and got my new bus pass... I was avoiding buying a new pass as the hurt of my last one being nicked was too fresh... I got a really dodgy picture done in one of those booths after it was stolen... Today at lunch I had the bright idea of getting another one done that was less grim so that my pass would be cheery... I'm a dolt... I must have turned off my brain as without choosing an option I ended up in the booth with the instructions be dictated to me in Italian... being smug that I could understand I didn't re-adjust... The picture was taken and I waited outside the machine... Little did I realize... that my cockiness had also produced the pictures in the wrong format... I didn't get the four wallet sized ones... oh no... I got the 16 miniature ones in black and white... god knows what one would use them for. DAMN IT! so I had to resolve to use the dodgy ones I had in the first place... the ones where one eye is squinted and the other not... I look like I have a facial deformity... no really it's bad... the bad part is... that I really think I do have one eye that is bigger than the other! Am I the only person who didn't know this? Have my friends and family always known and just assumed that I did too and never mentioned it? This is a BIG question... not at all an important one but careful revision of old photos show striking evidence.... just when I thought I couldn't get any more self absorbed... I never cease to amaze myself.

the stray sunbeams...

certainly did leave their marks on a lot of people around the office. There are quite a few rosy faces and brown ones too. It was a lovely weekend. The kind that feels just long enough. Rare indeed, appreciated, oh yes!

Saturday pre-gym I picked up this groovy hand painted original canvas for KJ... almost like the one she fancied in the shop near Kings Cross when she was here. The painting is of a flamenco dancer in a traditional red dress. It's quite lovely although the frame is terrible... It was a veritable bargain at 15£ compared to the 650£ print that she wanted. I have once again redeemed my bargain shopping abilities. She will be so proud. Now she's just got to return to London to visit me to collect it!

Post gym I got a dodgy hair cut.... that turned my mood foul... whatever... I know I can never win in the hair dept. I'm far too picky... but anyone in their right mind who comes near me with a razor to thin my already uber thin locks is freaking mad. Then to add insult to injury she did the standard 'i'm a hairdresser and I'm going to give you a bouffon hair do' even after I directly asked her to flatten it out and that I never wear my hair like that and that I was visibly upset by it... grrr. Had a great chat with Jackie on the phone Saturday night. I'm so excited about her stopping in London for a day on her way to India. It's been over 5 years since I last saw her in person!

Sunday morning /afternoon miss H and I ventured off to the Zoo... The 12£ is extortionate but it was so lovely outside that we didn't mind... Small but nice... not too many animals at all, seemed over populated with birds... not really my thing but the monkeys were cute especially the tiny ones (God I'm such a dolt I can't even remember what they're called) Seeing them made it worth it. Regent's park is so nice... I can't imagine what it would be like to have enough money to buy a flat near there! wow. It's fun to dream sometimes.

It's a week before my holidays but I think I'm going to pass and not take them after all... as travel is terribly dear during Easter and I could get something really nice and within budget if I wait till may to take the time off.... I do need a break but could perhaps hold off another few weeks.

I think I'm going to save to buy a bike... there are so many lovely outdoor spaces in this city that would be amazing on a bike... especially Hampstead... and a lot of the overland trains let you bring your bikes on board so that's handy! Wouldn't hit the main roads... too scary... but who knows...

Sexy Beast was on tele last night. Ben Kingsley is amazing. He really should have won an award for his performance in that film.